Breakups are never easy.

Some more painful than others.

Especially when you feel like you have given your all to the relationship or felt like this was going to be forever.

You attracted your partner because there were certain lessons that your souls were meant to teach each other.

You attract to yourself a reflection of your own consciousness at that particular time.

As you both evolve and grow, who you were when you first met won’t be who you are months, years or decades into your relationship.

This is growth.

As long as you grow together at a similar pace, in a similar direction, with a similar vision and core values, you are able to keep growing.

The challenge is when either one of you stops growing or you grow in directions that are too far apart to find common ground.

You can see breaking up as a failure, or you can see it as a gift.

Here are 4 steps to dealing with a breakup:

  1. Take space: Take time alone to be with yourself. A mistake that people make is immediately jumping into another relationship when they haven’t dealt with their emotions from the previous one. Jumping into a new relationship can be a distraction and keep you stuck, since your unresolved emotions will likely cloud your new relationship. It’s important to take the time to rediscover yourself again.
  2. Feel your feelings: Breakups can be painful. Sometimes so excruciating that we do whatever we can to not feel the pain. Avoiding the pain simply keeps you stuck. The quickest way to let go, is to consciously feel the pain without judgment or resistance. Not wallowing in it but simply feeling it with intention to release it. No feelings last forever, and all feelings that you feel fully will dissolve. Give yourself permission to grieve and trust that you will indeed move through it.
  3. Learn the lessons: All lessons are repeated until learned. If you don’t learn the lessons in your relationship, you will simply repeat it in another. So take time to reflect on – Why you attracted this person into your life? What lessons did you need to learn? Did you learn those lessons? How did you grow? What would you have done differently?
  4. Forgiveness and gratitude: After a breakup, it can be easy to have some feelings of resentment or anger, especially if the other person didn’t meet your expectations. Holding on to resentments only brings you down. When you forgive, you set yourself free. So choose to forgive, bless your partner, and let them go. How you break up will impact your next relationship.

Each person comes into your life for a different purpose. Some will stay for a brief moment, some for a season and some for a lifetime.

Just because the form of your relationship ends, it doesn’t mean the loving needs to stop or that it’s been a failure. It just means you needed to find a different form that most allows you both to grow into the highest version of yourself.

When you commit to loving no matter what, then you are free.

So trust that someone even better for you is being orchestrated by the universe and will show up at exactly the right time.

Your breakup is a blessing in disguise, clearing the way for more love in your life.

Your heart can never be broken.

Your heart is stronger than you know.

Your heart is made of the stuff of the universe.

You are love itself.

Love.Now

Kute

P.S. If you are ready to transform the hidden blocks that keep you from love and creating the life of your dreams, join me and women from all over the world at www.themanbreakthroughexperience.com in Los Angeles.

P.P.S. Please share this blog with all those in your life. I would also love to hear your comments below!

9 comments on “How To Bounce Back From a Breakup

  1. Zora on

    As always, you covered this subject thoroughly, deeply and compassionately. This is exactly how I have come to peace so many times in my life, and this is an excellent re-minder. You go it right on! Thank you! Love – Z

    Reply
  2. Karen on

    Kute, I need to hear this over and over again. You covered it perfectly. I needed to hear this so desparately. I was married to the same man for 48 yrs. my whole life. I don’t know how to live alone or love another. He broke my heart by cheating for the second and last time in my marriage. Only, the first time, we had four teenagers. I could not dare trust to make ends meet and single parent four teens. We worked it out, although I was deeply hurt for the rest of my life. This was a gray divorce, you put a reason to my hurt. This time, we outgrew each other. It’s not that we’re divorced that I can not forgive him for, but how he handled his selfish ways through the proceedings and how it was ok that he gipped me out of so much and stole from me as well. Would you believe we had never fought. and we seemed to be enjoying life together. We seemed to be content. I was totally blind-sided by this and how he handled the divorce is what hurts so badly, is unforgivable and as much as I have tried for the last four years, I can’t get thru the hurt and anger and move on.

    I was so impressed with this video that I thought if I sign up by email, maybe you will come thru with other relationship videos that may hit home and help, as this one did. Thanks for listening to me.

    Reply
    • Kute Blackson on

      Absolutely Karen. I have many blog videos on relationships – please explore the site and watch as many as you can. I also have a women’s seminar in Los Angeles twice a year where I go even deeper into exploring relationships in all areas of your life. It’s a powerful weekend for women – a journey into the soul that helps clear away old patterns, pain and trauma that can heal you in the most profound way moving forward. I highly encourage you to join – the next one is on May 5-7th. Check out the website here: http://www.themanbreakthroughexperience.com. Also – email us for a discounted ticket option – info@themanbreakthroughexperience.com. I’d really love to see you there – I believe it would be powerful for you at this time in your life. Keep on Karen!!!! You are love!

      Reply
  3. Lianna on

    Thank-you for bringing clarity to the pain I am feeling right now. I know he is a reflection of me. I have already attracted and connected with a few other similar “his energy” people. I am learning however and seeing the patterns I create. I want something different. Something much more loving of me which I know starts with supporting and loving myself. I forgive, I love and I release.
    So good Kute!

    Reply

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