Having the greatest sex has nothing to do with having sex.

The greatest sex is beyond physical.

Great sex is a result of something deeper.

The greatest sex isn’t about learning the best Kama Sutra techniques. Incredible positions without heart connection and love will leave you feeling empty.

It’s about the flow of energy between you and your partner, and the understanding that sex is a sacred energetic exchange and offering to each other that has the power to heal.

Great sex isn’t about how long you can keep it up or how many orgasms you have but how open your heart is.

When your hearts are open to each other, and you feel each other deeply, you recognize that inside the body of your lover is the Divine.

Great sex isn’t about proving something or a performance, it’s an offering of love. An opportunity to worship the essence of Infinite consciousness through your lover’s form. Their body becomes the temple for you to pray. Sex becomes a sacred spiritual practice.

Great sex isn’t about getting somewhere or achieving some peak moment, it’s in savoring every moment of the journey and exploration.

The foundation of great sex is the emotional connection and intimacy you have with your partner. The foundation of intimacy with your partner is determined by the connection you have with yourself.

The depth of connection that you have with each other’s hearts will impact the depth of your willingness to trust your partner, to open and let them in.

Trust is a foundation for great sex.

To trust them not just with your body, but your heart and soul. It’s when you trust each other deeply that you can surrender yourselves to the bigger force of love, however it wants to express through you.

The more you trust, the more you can let them in. It can be a vulnerable thing but it’s then that you can touch each other’s soul. It’s then that you feel the oneness of being.

To trust is vulnerable and great sex requires vulnerability. Vulnerability requires courage, and truly great sex is not for cowards.

Bad sex simply isn’t a pleasurable or inspiring experience. The energy is off and it doesn’t feel good or enjoyable in any way. It doesn’t fulfill any of your needs.

Average sex is when the experience is OK. It’s functional. It’s simply good enough, and meets your biological need.

Good sex is when it’s pleasurable, you get enjoyment from it. It’s still a feel good mostly physical experience and meets an emotional need sometimes. You derive a level of comfort but deep down you know there’s still something missing.

Great sex is ecstatic. You lose yourself, you let go of control and surrender to love itself. You aren’t merely trying to get something from another, but sex becomes a vehicle to express the depth of love in your heart with another soul. It’s a spiritual experience. It’s an experience of two souls becoming one.

So before you have sex, really get to know your partner. Communicate deeply about what’s meaningful to you. Open your hearts to each other. Share the depth of who you are, your fears, vulnerabilities, things you have been withholding/secrets, what turns you on and what inspires you. As you open your hearts to each other, you make love in the purest way without even touching physically!

Transparency is sexy since when there’s nothing in the space between the both of you, your energy flows much more effortlessly.

Authenticity is the greatest turn on for the heart. Love is the greatest turn on for the soul.

It’s when you dare to lose yourself in the soul of your lover that you will find true ecstasy.

-So look deep into their eyes as you make love. And you will see infinity smiling at you.

-Feel your lover’s heart and acknowledge the human being full of vulnerabilities, tenderness, fear, courage and beauty. Knowing it is a privilege that you get to share such a beautifully intimate moment together.

-Relax your fixed attention off of yourself, and feel outwards through your lover, so that you not only touch their body, but you make love to their soul.

When you really feel the soul of your lover it transforms how you touch them. Their body is the temple for the soul that you love.

How would you enter a sacred temple?

How would you touch the Divine?

Great sex is an expression of love.

As you love yourself, you become more discerning with whom you engage sexually.

You see there is no such thing as casual sex. When you have sex, you open up the most vulnerable parts of yourself, and over time there develops an energetic and physiological bond of attachment with the other person. And the process of untangling can be hard and sometimes painful.

The more aware, honest and discerning you are up front, the more you will save yourself unnecessary pain later on.

Before you have sex, ask yourself:

1) What is my real intention here??

Be honest. Don’t have sex in an effort to have it lead to a committed relationship.

2) How will I feel tomorrow if I have sex with this person?

3) Am I honoring myself by having sex with this person? Am I honoring them by having sex?

4) Do I feel safe?

5) Can I trust this person to honor, respect and take care of my heart ?

6) What do I really really want?

Why would you dishonor yourself by having sex with someone that doesn’t honor you?

Bottom line- choosing wisely who you have sex with is the most honoring and self loving thing you can do!

What is it that we are really seeking through sex?

We are truly seeking the experience of Oneness. Not merely some bodies rubbing up against each other trying to get a release for a fleeting moment.

It’s why orgasm is so pleasurable, since for a few moments, “You” dissolve. You are gone. In that moment there’s no separation between you and anything else. And Oneness is the ultimate freedom.

Great sex is when no one is having sex. You surrender so deeply, that you both dissolve, and only love remains.

No you.

No lover.

Only love.

Love is the foundation for great sex.

You are love.

If you want to have the greatest sex of your life..

…. Surrender fully to LOVE.



P.S. If you are ready to transform the hidden blocks that keep you from love and creating the life of your dreams, join me and women from all over the world at www.themanbreakthroughexperience.com on October 9-11th in Los Angeles.  Sign up now for a discounted price and to bring a family member for Free!

P.P.S. I would love to hear about your most ecstatic sexual experiences in the comments below.

20 comments on “How to Have the Greatest SEX of Your Life!

  1. Patsy on

    Kute, this is the best talk on sexuality that I have ever heard. It is inspirational, celebrates our essence and who we truly are at the core. You eloquently but firmly articulate the heart of great sex being an open and sacred exchange between our bodies and our souls. The process is a continual flow of universal energy of love and connectedness flowing through the couple and we are not only making love, but being love. If a lot of people watched and practiced this type of sexuality often, it would change the world from the inside out in a very short time. I am doing my part and passing it on. I am a relationship and spiritual counselor and will use the inspiration in this video in my personal as well as professional practice. Thank you and infinite blessings. Patricia Felton

    • Kute Blackson on

      Yes Patricia (Patsy)!! I am touched to hear that you will be sharing this with your personal and professional community, and that you feel this deeply. Spreading the love of expanded awareness… blessings to you!! Keep on. Much love!!!!

  2. Patricia Felton on

    Kute, this is the best video on sexuality that I have ever heard. You eloquently but firmly articulate the exchange of how 2 people can open up and enjoy the steady stream of infinite love through their bodies and souls. I am so inspired I am sending it to all my friends. I am a relationship and spiritual counselor so will use it in my personal life as well as for my clients. If people were to view and practice what this video says on a regular basis the world would be changed in a very short period of time from the inside out. Thank you with gratitude! Patricia Felton

  3. Natalie B on

    Thanks Kute!! This is really wonderful. So well put, helpful, beautiful, inspiring, and an amazing reminder. I’m going to boldly ask a question!! I have a relationship with an ex-partner I know we’ve spoken about where that connection is really deep and the sex really is actually the greatest I’ve ever experienced – connected, etc. We love eachother, are great friends and communicate well. We both are single and are grateful for the companionship. Its more than sex in that we snuggle, watch movies, laugh together, but we aren’t in a committed partnership in life. What we want in life is mis-aligned at the moment. I’m not holding out any hope that this will change, but would be open to a relationship with him again if it did. I actually feel that this works, but I second guess it cause its unconventional and wonder if its blocking me from attracting someone more fully available. At the same time, I’m in a massive phase of evolution and focusing on myself, I don’t think I’m open to that at the moment anyway and am enjoying taking care of these needs when it works for both of us! I do feel I can move on without attachment when the time is right, but don’t want to yet 🙂 Just curious about your thoughts on this. thanks in advance!! xo

    • Kute Blackson on

      Natalie, I actually just made a blog video response to your question because it’s a great question that will serve many people! Thank you for sharing your heart. Stay tuned. Sending love!!

  4. Ani on

    Hi Kute, I love you, you’ve brought so much joy to my heart. I discovered your work recently and I’m glad to read your view of sex. Here’s the thing, I’ve read the comments and Chris, the last response, really brings up so many of the and the doubts and fearful beliefs that my Christian back ground and shame and controlling childhood has fostered in me. Please respond to Chris, respond me. Is sex outside of marriage sin? Is this desire in my heart to connect to a man in this way lust? Will loose my connection to God because of it?

  5. Priscilla Moonsamy on

    Dear Kute

    Thank you so much for this. This video is freedom in an area I have been struggling with all my life basically.

    Much Love

  6. Trisha Mewhinney on

    This is what true lovemaking is all about. Thank you for so beautifully and eloquently articulating this message. I agree with one of the other commenters who said that if more people practiced this type of love, it would change the world from the inside out.

    Bless you Kute. You are a blessing to humanity. It would be great if you could re-post this over and over again on your Facebook Page. This is a message that is really needed now.


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