No matter how spiritual you may be, or how much you meditate, do yoga, go to temple, betrayal is painful.

It hurts when someone you trust does something or says something that hurts you in some way. Or they cheat.

It can be heartbreaking when you invest so much into a relationship, give so much of yourself, and trust is broken.

You are human. Acknowledging the pain is a step towards healing.

In moments when you feel betrayed, it’s easy and understandable why you may never want to trust again.

It might feel safer to contract, close your heart as a protection, shut down, become bitter and give up on love.

Doing so only gives power to the person that may have betrayed you.

If you have been betrayed. I am deeply sorry for your pain. There’s nothing you did wrong.

In this human experience, no human being is perfect. Pain is inevitable. It’s guaranteed that we will all make mistakes at some point in life. As you deal with other people who are also imperfect human beings doing the best they can, it can often get messy.

Love can be an incredibly challenging path. As we sometimes act out of our childhood wounds and past programming, we may end up doing things that we regret and didn’t even know why we did them.

If you have been betrayed, it is easy to hold onto the pain of the past, but this will keep you recreating the past in your future.

If you have been betrayed, it is easy to hold onto blaming the other person. But this keeps you stuck in being a victim, and you remain powerless.

You are not a victim but a powerful creator. At any given moment you can choose what you will do and what your reality will be.

It takes courage to give up blaming and take responsibility.

To take responsibility is to examine what your part is in any situation.

If outer experience is a reflection of inner reality, ask yourself, “What is this person mirroring to me about myself?”

And… “What ways do I betray myself?”

Yes, it is painful when someone you love betrays you. But what is even more painful are the ways you may have betrayed yourself. Some you may be aware of, and some might be completely unconscious to you.

So when you are in the midst of dealing with betrayal, be loving with your own heart. It’s easy to beat yourself up for making a certain choice or not seeing what was coming. Instead, be gentle with yourself. Learn the lessons inherent in the situation. And forgive yourself fully.

So what if betrayal was in fact a gift?

It shows you your own self-betrayal, and where you are out of integrity with yourself. Thus giving you the opportunity to heal, commit to yourself more deeply and honor who you really are.

When you betray yourself, you simply set yourself up to be betrayed.

We betray ourselves in order to be loved, validated, fit in and be accepted.

You betray yourself every time you say “Yes” when you mean “No”.

Or when you feel an intuition and ignore it.

Or break your commitments to yourself and don’t follow through.

Each time you do so, you lose self-trust and drain your own power.

How do you betray yourself?

You can let the pain of betrayal close your heart. Or you can allow it to be a wake-up call to love yourself and commit to yourself more deeply.

The more you honor you and be your authentic self, the more you are truly able to honor another person and give others the opportunity to honor who you really are.

It’s then that you can have a real relationship. The real relationship starts with you. This is the foundation of every relationship.

Be faithful to yourself, and you will attract to you a person that is a reflection of your own self-loving.

And if you don’t like who and what is showing up in your life…

Change yourself first.



P.S. Join me in Bali for a profoundly life-changing journey on December 5-16th. Apply Now. Miracles await you.

P.P.S. I would love to hear your comments below!!

4 comments on “How To Deal With Betrayal

  1. Silja Bjorklund on

    So true. If a particular incident dealing with hurt had not happen in my life, I would not have seen how I was behaving myself. The other person was not ready to forgive, however I work on staying open and having no demands or expectations.

    • Raveica on

      Hello Kute!

      I completely agree with you! I observed this in my own life. If I do something with me or with others that means less than love and I don’t observe this, always in my external world appear someone that will do the same thing with me. So, this is a new great oportunity for me to observe what I do and to change it. Because I know that others are in fact my reflections, became easy for me to accept what they do without suffering . In fact, they love me so much showing me that I am not love.
      Finally, I don’t judge me or they, I make peace with me and they, I assume all responsibility for my creation and I transform myself. And then miracles happen! Thanks, because you don’t let me forget who I really am!

      • Kute Blackson on

        Yes we are all a reflection!!! Beautiful. Thank you for sharing Raveica! Keep on & keep loving. Hugs!

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