There are certain moments in life when you know that you need to have a difficult conversation and share a deeper truth.

Difficult conversations require more of you. They require that you dig within yourself and access a part of you that might have been dormant.

It’s not always easy sharing the truth of how you really feel with another. But it’s essential if you are to grow, be fulfilled and have real relationships.

Honest communication frees you and frees the other. When you withhold, it creates a blockage in your relationship and deeper intimacy is blocked.

We often hold back having difficult conversations because we are afraid of how others will respond and the resulting conflict.

Or we are afraid to cause harm to someone we love.

Or we fear the end of our relationship.

If your relationship ends as result of a difficult conversation, likely it wasn’t truly aligned anyways. Your honesty simply brought to the surface that you were no longer a vibrational match.

So, what difficult conversation do you need to have?

And with whom?

Whatever it is, it’s OK to acknowledge your fear. By acknowledging it, you can deal with it and move through it.

Some keys that will help you have a difficult conversation:

1. Connect to your heart- Before you have your difficult conversation, take a moment to connect to your heart. It can be easy to contract, disconnect and shut down as a way to protect yourself from possible rejection. But then your communication will likely come across more inauthentically.

2. Share your intention-  Before you begin expressing your difficult communication, share your intention for communicating. Being on the receiving end of difficult truths can be tough. So rather than just launching in with your most difficult truths, take a moment to share the “Why” you are sharing. Likely you are sharing because the relationship is important enough to you. You love the person and want to have a great relationship with them. So the intention of the communication is to serve a better relationship.

Just knowing this can put the other person at ease and off the defensive. This will help them be more open to what you have to say.

3. Speak your complete truth authentically- Firstly, make sure you are clear about what you really want to express and express it all. Do not withhold. There’s a tendency to share part of our truth and not go all the way, in order to avoid conflict. Your responsibility is to communicate your feelings, with love, compassion and ownership. When conflict still remains, it usually means there is an even deeper truth that still needs to be communicated.

4. Communicate without attachment to the response- When you share your difficult truth, simply communicate to communicate. You are communicating not to get a specific response but for your own integrity and sense of freedom. Those you share with may agree, understand or not. What is important is that you were true to yourself.

Ultimately, the truth serves everyone, even it doesn’t seem that way at first. By speaking your truth, you honor yourself as well as the other person.

The truth is the greatest gift you could give yourself or another.

A difficult conversation is simply a beautiful opportunity for a breakthrough to more love.

Make more love.



P.S. If you feel ready to go to the next level in your life, reclaim your power and live your true life’s purpose, join me on a life changing journey, Apply if you are ready.

P.P.S. Please share your comments below and share this blog with all those you love!

4 comments on “How to Have a Difficult Conversation (The 4 Vital Keys)

  1. Phyll on

    My next-door neighbors (a couple in their mid-60’s) want to cut back my beautiful, full Arborvitae as they say some of it hangs over onto our shared easement between our houses. The shape is lovely, rounded, full, attractive. It doesn’t obstruct anything or have shaggy branches but is neat and nice and I love it. I’ve expressed my desire not to have it cut back and an arborist said cutting back too far could kill it. The couple still want to cut it back and plan to in November. Kute, can you please help me? I’m scared, heart-broken and feel bullied (dare I tell them THAT?)

  2. Ma'el on

    Thanks for the pep talk!! I’m nervously excited about this. I’m ready man! I’m ready!! Now when I finally find the courage to difficult-ly communicate may you please hold my hand so I don’t run off again like chicken sh!t.

  3. Marc on

    Oy. Get to the point. Your rhetorical, point minicing, yammering speaking manner –coupled with the annoying OVER animation and rocking back and forth, the flapping hand gestures added with pictures of YOU everywhere (in what I can only guess are what you think cool gestures and poses) makes me think it’s really all about YOU. All that blabbing can be reduced to one sentence –That being: Approach difficult conversations with love tolerance and respect.


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