Suffering is caused by the story you make up about your reality.

What stories are you making up about yourself and your life?

What impact are they having?

Life isn’t suffering. Life simply IS.

It’s not what happens to you, but how you interpret and what you make it mean that causes you suffering.

Suffering is not a requirement.

Pain is inevitable and suffering is optional.

The story you make up about whatever is happening in your life creates your suffering.

You do not have to suffer unless you choose.

We sometimes become addicted to suffering as a false way to feel alive. Struggle becomes the drug of choice that we use for a cheap high.

From a young age we become conditioned and as a result disconnected from ourselves, our feelings, and our innate aliveness. Then as a way to FEEL, we often unconsciously create drama, struggle and suffering in an attempt to reconnect with this aliveness.

You suffer because:

  1. You forgot who you really are – that you are whole, perfect and complete. That you are a magnificent expression of the Divine thus start seeking outside for what you think will complete you. This is a never-ending quest, and only creates more suffering. Nothing outside can complete you.
  2. You resist reality – Fighting reality in an attempt to maintain control. Control is the master addiction. Trying to control life, people around you, much of which is not in your control, is a recipe for suffering. So focus only on what is actually in your control and learn to accept life as it is. Before you change your reality, you must first accept your current reality.
  3. Focusing on the past or the future – none of which is happening now. We beat ourselves up about our past which we can’t change, or we create negative future fantasies about the future which hasn’t happened and may never happen. We then experience the fear of the future fantasy in the present as though real. This only leads to suffering. So breathe and stay in the present moment.

Ultimately, suffering arises due to our fear of not being “Something” or “Someone”.

Struggle is often a way to reinforce the existence of “yourself” … your ego.

You do not need to suffer and struggle anymore. Suffering is not a reflection of how spiritual you are.

Life loves you unconditionally, exactly as you are in this very moment. You do not need to earn the love of the Universe or God.

You are enough exactly as you are.

So Surrender.

To surrender is to give up resisting life and let go of control. This can sometimes be scary because it requires that “you” dissolve. But when you surrender, you open yourself to be lived by that which is living everything.

Dare to be LIVED by life itself, then struggle ceases and Life moves through you in miraculous ways.



P.S. If you feel ready to go to the next level in your life, reclaim your power and live your true life’s purpose, join me on a life changing journey, on July 4-15, 2017.  Apply if you are ready.

P.P.S. Please share your comments below and share this blog with all those you love!

5 comments on “How To Stop Suffering and Give Up Struggling

  1. Cross315 on

    I have come to believe that what we experience in life is a CHOICE. We can say that, “it is partly cloudy” but we don’t say, “it is partly sunny.” As an ESL teacher I have learned so much from my students. The first word they learn is love. All they know is love. As they become older they are taught other feelings. I choose love and have taught my students to embrace the love of life they feel. When we experience being uncomfortable it is a form of growth and we can learn from the experience. We can put any label on it that we choose. Unfortunately, we usually mislabel the experience and it creates suffering and even illness. I choose to find the good!

  2. Jane Su-Ming Lai on

    Thank you Kute,
    we need to be reminded of the things we do to ourselves and it becomes second nature that we are not even aware of those debilitating behaviours and thoughts we impose on ourselves , until we begin to love and appreciate and accept ourselves.

    I met your few years ago when you were running in to Ubud Aura and we had a chat about your work, and I saw you again at Ida Resi with some of your clients.
    I’ve been in Ubud and studying Kundalini Tantra Yoga with Ketut Arsana of Bodyworks whom I know you would have met.. and I have finally produced my list of Meditation cds with a media artist from Melbourne, he inserts the music and binaural brain waves. We are both John Demartini graduates. Our facebook page is called Shakti Experience 108….

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