You attract to you in relationship who you are.

Do you like what you see?

You are constantly in relationship with yourself.

Every single one of your relationships have been a success, even if they didn’t last forever. They have served to bring you a step closer to your true self.

The partners you attract to you in the form of the man or woman, are a physical manifestation of who and where you are at in your own consciousness at this moment in time.

Look at who you attracting. What does this mirror to you about your own self?

There is so much information out there about finding the perfect partner.

The perfect partner is whoever you are with.

Let me expain: The perfect partner is that partner that mirrors perfectly where you are in your growth right now. They are the perfect mirror that serves as your inspiration and impetus to heal and grow into more of your authentic self.

The perfect partner is not someone that never makes mistakes, but the person that is willing to own their “stuff”, open through their resistances and love through their fears.

The perfect partner is someone that is willing to grow and is also committed to serving your Soul’s growth, so that you both can be more of who you really are.

The person you attract to you in an intimate relationship is no mistake. They are perfect for you right now. They may not be perfect for you forever but in this moment, you attracted them and were attracted to them for a reason.

The best you can do to prepare yourself for relationship with a potential romantic partner is to cultivate a loving and compassionate relationship with your self and clear whatever might be in the way of you giving and receiving love.

Many of us want a relationship but we are not truly in relationship with ourselves. We want our partners to love us but we still reject ourselves.

You must start by giving to yourself the love that you are already and want from another.

So if you want to attract the right person then be the right person. The “right” person is the most authentic expression of yourself that you can access and be in this moment. You are the “right” person when you are willing to love and accept you for who you are and who you are not.

You cannot control people outside of yourself. But you can be responsible for yourself and how you are showing up in the world. You can be responsible for loving as fully as you can, and living an authentic life.

So take an honest look and see what blocks there are inside you? What parts of yourself are you resenting or ashamed of? What aspects of yourself are you judging? What are the incomplete wounds inside of you, that need your love and healing embrace?

As you accept yourself, you will feel differently, and relate to yourself differently. You become truly powerful. From this place of wholeness you will attract to yourself a mate that is more likely to accept you at that level, as well as mirror your love and self acceptance back to you.

You attract to yourself a partner at the level of your self acceptance.

Trying to change your partner is a recipe for suffering.

Taking responsibility for changing yourself is a recipe for freedom.

You choose.

It’s OK to want your partner to change but only after you can fully accept that who they are right now is enough! Then you are at peace whether they change or not. And you are free to love them as they are.

As you change yourself, you will find that either they change and grow to reflect the expanded version of who you are in this moment. Or you will grow apart, and you will have a change of partner that matches your new frequency.

Know this:

The perfect partner is whoever you are with in that moment.

This is being reflected to you in those you attract whether you like it or not

If you don’t like what you see.

Don’t blame the mirror.

Don’t blame yourself


Own it and change yourself.

Then see who now shows up!

The perfect partner is YOU.



P.S. – SPECIAL ATTENTION WOMEN: Sign UP today for my powerful weekend seminar for  to understand men more deeply, and transform the hidden blocks that keep you from attracting the love you deserve. It will be a life changing event held in Los Angeles, CA. Join me!!!

33 comments on “How to attract your perfect partner and the keys to making it a guaranteed success!

  1. Paul on

    Just curious. Do you see many relationships that embody what you’re talking about? Meaning, practicing selflessness, and serving each others growth. Because, I have to say, I’m sure not meeting women who are interested in this kind of a conscious relationship.

    • Kute Blackson on

      They are out there, I assure you! Remember Paul, people we attract into our lives are a mirror reflection to us. You may want to take a step back and ask yourself if you’re truly ready yourself. And if you are ready, then perhaps your doubts in finding this in someone are blocking you. Keep an open heart and clear intentions and you will gravitate towards what you desire.

  2. Dani Katz on

    Hurray!!!! Finally, a perspective on relationships that resonates!!!! Thanks for singing the capital T-Truth, Kute!!! This is what I’ve been holed up writing about for the past three years! An excerpt from my forthcoming book for you and y(our) tribe to enjoy…

    “It’s a beautiful fantasy – the one that tells us that love lasts, and is safe and secure, and that because we said so, we’ll be together forever. I love the fantasy, and I even long for it sometimes, despite the fact that I know it’s a lie. But, the reality is: every relationship ends. Even if you’re among the quickly shrinking percentage of happily married folks who manage to stay together until death does you part, death will eventually do you part. When we promise some monotheistic overlord – or anyone, for that matter – that a relationship won’t end, we compound the agony of un-bonding, and divvying up the books, the art and the jumper cables with an opinion called failure.

    Without the artificial endgame called “forever” stapled to our expectations, our relationships are free to ebb and flow and shift, organically, “successfully.” Every relationship in which I’ve ever engaged gave me invaluable lessons and unnamable treasures that I carry with me always. They are not failures because they end. They are simply expressions of the nature of reality. Everything changes – seasons, hairstyles, and especially people, as well as the dynamics they engage. Endings are devastating enough without the added weight of imagined defeat thrown into the mix to exacerbate the ouch of separation.”

    from the forthcoming book that my agent isn’t currently letting me call Love in the Time of Chemtrails. Stay tuned!

  3. Michelle on

    Amen Kute…..I so resonate with how beautifully you articulate this. Every relationship is an assignment to help us grow in our ability to Love. I know in my heart (and soul) that relationships serve our Soul’s Growth. We have to unhook from society ideas about what success means on all levels, especially relationships. For me, I see every person who has come into my life as a great teacher and I know that I am a great healer. All is divinely orchestrated so we can grow….love, love, love your words of wisdom.
    With great gratitude, Bright MIchelle

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